Fumigator |
Lieutenant General |
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Joined: 27 Jul 2004 |
Posts: 20993 |
Location: San Francisco, CA |
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QUOTE | BOOK 1
?The Silent Void?
Thus spoke Tim Gift:
? When you have learned to mid-air mortar,
it will be time for you to Leave?
1.1
Something unknown is formed, born in the Silent Void.
Waiting alone and unmoving ? it is momentarily still,
yet in constant motion.
It is the source of all things Tribal. I do not know
it's name, so I will call it the Tao of Tribes.
If the Tao is great, then the server is great.
If the server is great, then the ping is great.
If the ping is great, then the game is great.
The pubber is pleased, and there is harmony in the world.
The Tao of Tribes flows far away and returns on the
wind of
morning.
1.2
The Tao gave birth to Dynamix. Dynamix
gave birth to Slacker.
Slacker gave birth to Tribes. Now there are thousands
of players.
Each player has its purpose, however humble. Each
player expresses the Yin and Yang of the Game.
Each player has its place within the Tao.
But do not deal with CyanidePanda if you can avoid it.
1.3
In the beginning was the Tao. The Tao gave birth to Ping
and Framerate.
Therefore Ping and Framerate are the Yin and Yang of Tribes.
Players that do not comprehend the Tao are always
complaining about
Ping and Framerate of their Game. Players that
comprehend the
Tao always possess DSL and 3dfx.
How could it be otherwise?
1.4
The wise player is told about Tao and follows it.
The average player is told about Tao and searches for it.
The foolish player is told about Tao and searches for
autoaim.cs.
If it were not for newbies, there would be no Tao.
The oob snipers are hardest to see. Going forward is a
way to get disk-mined.
Great talent shows itself late in Game. Even a
perfect capper still has botched routes.
BOOK 2
?The Legendary Masters?
Thus spoke Tim Gift:
?After three days without Tribes
life becomes meaningless.?
2.1
The players of the old were mysterious and powerful.
We cannot fathom their skill and strategies, so all we do
is describe their appearance.
Strong like a charging bull.
Stealthy like a midnight predator.
Fast like a gray hawk.
Noble like a king.
Who can tell the secrets of their minds?
The answer exists only in Tao.
2.2
The Grandmaster Natural once dreamed that he was a newbie.
When he awoke, he exclaimed:
?I do not know whether I am Natural dreaming that
I am a newbie,
Or a newbie dreaming that I am Natural!?
2.3
A Player from a respected clan went to a LAN party
and returned to report to his leader, saying:
?What kind of Players are these? They behaved strangely
and only stopped playing to smoke marijuana.
Their appearance was bad and unkempt, hair long and
greasy, and hands cramped from clutching the mouse.?
The Leader said:
"I should have never sent you to the
LAN. Those players live beyond the physical world.
They consider life absurd, an accidental coincidence.
They come and go without knowing limitations.
Without a care, they live only for their game.
Why should they bother with social conventions?
They are alive within the Tao."
2.4
A newbie once asked the #tribes op?
?Here is a player who never practices and is not in a tribe.
Yet all who know him think him to be the greatest player
in the Game?
The Op replied:
"That Player has mastered the Tao.
He has gone beyond the need for practice;
he does not become angry when the ping is high
but accepts the universe without concern.
He has gone beyond the need for a tribe;
he no longer cares if anyone else covers him.
He is perfect within himself. Truly, he has entered
the mystery of Tao."
and set ??v? on the newbie.
BOOK 3
?Strategy?
Thus spoke Tim Gift:
?When in the battlefield it is too late
to make changes.?
3.1
There was once a Player who went to a
great big LAN party. Each day during that
party he would come in and tell the security
guard at the door:
?I am a famous thief and this LAN will
not go unplundered?
These words disturbed the security guard deeply
as the LAN was full of expensive equipment.
Each day he would watch the Player carefully
and give him full body searches after the day was over,
but to no avail.
At the end of the festivities the Player told the security
guard that he has plundered a great deal of booty.
Greatly perplexed the guard asked him what booty was
The Player talking about, since nothing was found on him.
Player smiled and said:
?I?ve been stealing strategies?
3.2
There was once a great tribe, which achieved victories
without any apparent strategy.
A younger inexperienced tribe seeking to imitate them
tried to do battle without a strategy and got schooled
viciously by their first opponent.
When the leader of the younger clan asked the leader
of the veterans to evaluate them, the Master Leader
criticized him for lack of strategy, saying:
?What is appropriate for the Master is not
appropriate for the novice. You must understand
Tao before transcending strategy?
3.3
Grandmaster Cheater when still young
listened to complaints of his
fellow Players once and have found that lack
of Strategy causes great grief to them.
So with his word he created Cheaters Wayside,
Causing misbalance in the Tao.
The misbalance disturbed harmony.
Therefore llamas appeared to balance out Cheaters
positive energies.
3.4
Master Ballistic once said:
?I believe in the "perfect tribes moment" as I call it. Every so often
in the rare times I pub CTF I see no bitching, no TK's, people playing
defense, and I have better than average prediction. I feel a serene feeling
of oneness with every Player from the Newbie to fellow Master.?
When the Strategy is good the Tao is also good,
the caps and wins are plentiful
and there is harmony in the world.
BOOK 4
?Leadership?
Thus spoke Tim Gift:
?Let the Players be many and the
Leaders few - then all will be good?
4.1
A well-used door needs no oil on its hinges.
A swift-flowing stream does not grow stagnant.
A deer blends perfectly into the forest colors.
Tribe rots if not led properly.
These are great mysteries.
4.2
Grandmaster TheRedDread in his young
years accepted a Player into his team
once, seeing how good he was.
Indeed the Player was very skillful.
So great was Player?s ability,
that Grandmaster decided to
initiate him into the mystery of Tao.
The player however only laughed
At the Grandmaster saying that so great is
his skill, he does not need the Tao.
The Grandmaster banished the player
from the tribe immediately, and watched
as the other Tribes that Player was in
afterwards disbanded.
A great Leader not only understands
the Tao and follows it, but makes sure
that his Players know and embrace it too,
for Tribe without Tao is not a Tribe.
4.3
A great Leader knows Tao and
passes it on to his Tribe.
An average leader knows Tao
And keeps it to himself.
A bad leader rejects the Tao
and devastates his Tribe like
a Tsunami.
BOOK 5
?The Llamas?
Thus spoke Grandmaster elenex:
?What the fuck??
5.1
Once the Almighty Tim Gift was pubbing
on Grandmaster Cheater?s server and
got into a dire need of escort.
While skiing over a hill he noticed two
Players who were O sniping.
Covering his appearance with that of a
simple capper, Tim Gift asked them for
escort.
One of the Players promptly helped
Him, while the other one ignored the
request.
Upon making the cap Tim Gift shook off
His appearance of a capper and summoned
Both Players before him, and said the following:
?Both of you will be rewarded to the extent of your
worth in the Tao?
He then awarded the Player who helped him with
the skill of Mine Disk, and turned the other one into a
Llama, and doomed him and his offspring and the
offspring of his offspring to eternal Llamnation.
And that was how the first Llamas appeared.
5.2
It was said Each player has its purpose, however humble.
Each player has its place within the Tao.
But one must understand that there are two sides to Tao.
Embrace the Tao, accept the Tao and your life will be
fulfilling.
Reject the Tao, deny it, and slowly you will go to it?s
Darker side.
5.3
A then young Grandmaster Rasta asked Tim gift once:
?Master, I am perplexed. I want to accept and embrace the
Tao, but I do not know how. Help me understand the Tao.?
Thus replied Tim Gift:
?One cannot comprehend the Tao.
Can a Newbie comprehend favorites ?
Can a flag comprehend a Capper ?
Can a Renegades player comprehend Base?
One can only listen to the Tao and follow it.
But your willingness is commendable young Rasta.?
And after speaking so Tim Gift created the 10 posts.
5.4 ? The 10 posts of Tao
Thou shall not TK.
Thou shall not Flame.
Thou shall not Chat-Spam.
Thou shall not OOB Snipe.
Thou shall not Smurf.
Thou shall not Tribehop
Thou shall /ignore the Llamas
Thou shall respect Competition
Thou shall uphold Teamwork.
Thou shall not play Quake. |
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